


I could use your love

by whenineternal



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Beta/Beta Relationship, M/M, Pack Politics, Wolf AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-08
Updated: 2017-04-08
Packaged: 2018-10-16 08:32:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,232
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10567542
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/whenineternal/pseuds/whenineternal
Summary: Yixing is a beta, but he is nothing like how a beta should be.





	

Yixing is a beta, but he is nothing like how a beta should be. He is both fiercely protective and infinitely soft, growling threateningly at those who tread where they should not and curling up against the warmth of his lovers fur on the green forest ground, he is both dominant and submissive, but never at the same time. Maybe that is why they go so well together. Because while Yixing is nothing like a beta, Jongdae is exactly like one. A perfect specimen, as Joonmyeon had growled against his ear once long ago, docile but unafraid, adaptable and the spine of the pack, not unimportant, essential, and Jongdae was perfect.  
It was the first time he had seen Yixing’s face morph into something other than a serene smile as his glinting eyes darkened and his dimple disappeared behind a fierce snarl. He was sure Joonmyeon was going to kill him, Jongdae had never known his alpha leader to allow insubordination, but the odds of two against one became too much when Luhan and Yifan stepped up to protect their little brother. It had been mere months since the merging of their packs, and Joonmyeon had lost his pack leader status in the face of Luhan’s overbearing presence, and their combined strength would have torn him to shreds.  
Yixing claimed him that day, or at least as much as he could, but in the end it didn’t matter, because Jongdae found himself wanting him more than he could imagine ever wanting anyone else, and that reciprocated emotional bond will always be claim enough for them.  


  
  
Yixing and Joonmyeon have never gotten along after that first encounter, and sometimes they will clash together, always with words never with claws, but still Jongdae will know the moment Yixing comes pattering into their little den afterwards, shaking his fur of the near constant rain and slipping easily back into human form. It’s the agitated twitch of his head and then the clenching of his hands and the way he breaths deep and so controlled, and if Jongdae isn’t paying attention then he feels it in the way Yixing wraps himself around his body, pulls him down into the furs on the ground and licks him open before taking him on his knees. Like this Jongdae can only moan into the fur and clench around Yixing’s cock, rut back against him so that Yixing’s cock goes as deep inside him as is possible.

The pace is fast and rough, skin slapping against skin and the burning friction of Jongdae’s walls around him draws Yixing so close so fast he looses all rhythm until he stops suddenly, letting shallow thrusts into Jongdae’ ass and the muscles clenching around his base bring him over the edge as his cock empties inside of Jongdae.  
All the tension and anger is drained from Yixing’s body and he falls limply back into the furs, curling up as a low whine slips past his lips. Jongdae’s cock is still hard and he turns around on his knees and crawls between Yixing’s legs, his hands gliding over sweaty thighs and hooking under knees, Jongdae spreads oil over his own cock and slips easily past Yixing’s loose entrance. He fucks himself to a gentle orgasm inside Yixing and hides their moans in Yixing’s mouth and in between their tangling tongues.  
Yixing sleeps restlessly that night and Jongdae holds him close and wonders what could have put his reasonable mate so off centre.  
  
The sun wakes them early the next morning as it always does in summer, and when Yixing’s hold is a little too tight around Jongdae’s arm he decides not to mention it and instead grips Yixing’s hand just as tightly. Whatever happened yesterday, they will get through it together just as they do everything else.  
Conversation flows easily between the members of their modest pack, spread out on top of each other and cuddled together in various states of dress, all nibbling on their breakfast in between nuzzles. Jongdae can see Sehun and Tao in their hulking wolf forms with four pups each clutching at their fur, Taeyeon and Baekhyun’s and Yifan and Wendy’s most likely, their pups have taken a special liking to their youngest uncles, much to everyone’s horror, but right now Jongdae can’t even laugh at Sehun’s disgruntled face twisting even his wolfish snout as the pups bite at his ears. Because Yixing is silent beside him, not eating and his spine is ramrod straight and his body is wrecked with tremors from the tension running through him and the blank look on his face scares Jongdae.

  
He turns his face into Yixing’s neck and licks at the mating mark, large and faded pink and a replica of his own, and Yixing shivers heavily against him as some of the tension dissipates. Yixing nudges his head aside so he can do the same to him and Jongdae gets a clear view of Luhan and Minseok sitting on their own a little further away from the rest of them, as is normal these days. But Luhan’s attention is not on his mate but on them, his eyes watching them with an unreadable look and his mouth is downturned in what looks to be disapproval. But it can’t be, Luhan has always supported Yixing in everything, has always defended their relationship to the rest of the pack, they were allowed to be mated because he said so, so he has to be mistaken.  
  
The sudden silence draws him away from looking into Luhan’s dark eyes and when he raises his head, Jongdae is met with Joonmyeon standing above them, a giant bruise swelling his left eye and cheek, and looking murderous. Yixing is stiff as a board in Jongdae’s arms and hidden away in his neck and the tremors running through him now, Jongdae knows is from fear. And Jongdae understands a little more, but while it is still not enough, at least he knows Luhan hasn’t changed his mind concerning their love. Because Yixing did that, he punched Joonmyeon, an alpha, Jongdae’s former primary alpha and he still feels that instinctual indignation rise in him at the nerve of it, but he doesn’t even need to put up a fight to push it down as his wolf does it for him. He loves Yixing far more than he has ever loved Joonmyeon, and his wolf howls inside his mind at the insults Joonmyeon must have sprouted to elicit such a reaction from Yixing, the man whose wolf posses the most peaceful, harmonious aura of any Jongdae has ever met.  
  
The feeling when Yixing is ripped from his arms is one Jongdae never wants to experience again. The helplessness of not being able to hold onto his mate in the face of greater strength, and the last touch of Yixing’s hand in his own was like holding his heart, alive and beating, in his palm.  
It was a moment of sheer panic and then Luhan is there, making room for himself between Joonmyeon and Yixing and shielding the both of them from the other alpha. In the stifling silence Joonmyeon’s growls can be heard easily, but Luhan stays quiet, his left hand holding tight to Yixing’s forearm while his right hand is clenched by his hip, the only outward sign of his anger.

  
“If you want to fight Joonmyeon, make it a fair fight” Luhan mumbles, but Jongdae is sure every peaked ear heard it as well as he did. Joonmyeon hesitates, almost retreats in front of Luhan, but instead squares his shoulders and looks determinately into Luhan’s eyes.  
“You know what will happen if I win.”

That is all he says before leaving, changing and running off into the forest and Jongdae swallows when Luhan looks down at them, Yixing once again cradled in his arms and shaking like a lone leaf on a tree branch as a last remnant of autumn. Luhan sighs and goes back to where Minseok is still sitting, stone-faced but so angry, and pulls his mate with him back to their den.  
With the two alphas gone, the rest are all looking at them, curled into each other, and it all feels too judging for Jongdae to bear so he pulls Yixing to his feet and drags him by the hand, away from the piercing looks of their pack.  
  
They end up running through the trees and the high grass, towards the sea that is still miles away but that they can smell in the air when the wind blows right. There is a large fallen tree a ten minute run from their den, still inside territory, but far enough away that they always have it to themselves, overhung with green vines and covering a soft mossy bed and creating absolute solitude from the outside elements. This is where they go. They fall together onto the brown blanket laid atop the moss and Jongdae’s mouth is desperate against Yixing’s, his heart beating hard from the close call.

He nearly lost him. Joonmyeon wanted revenge for his defiance, and he would have it as is his right, and Yixing would have lost, lost the fight and lost his life against the alpha, if Luhan had not intervened. He can not bear to think about it anymore and with Yixing’s teary eyes locked on his own, Jongdae reaches for the pouch hanging over their heads and pulls so hard it tears down the seam. A washcloth, a sponge and a stopped phial of oil falls onto the blanket beside them and in his desperate need for his mate it takes Jongdae no less than seconds to exit the hideaway and fill a small wooden bowl with water from the spring not far off, and return to Yixing’s side to meld their bodies together in the warmest hug either will ever find.  
  
They hardly wear any clothes in the summer season, any of them, but Yixing tends to wear as little as he can get away with and the loose linen falls off his legs in drapes when Jongdae pulls on the fastening. He is bare underneath, his cock hanging limply in a nest of dark curls and he still smells slightly of sex, pulling Jongdae in to bury his face in Yixing’s groin. He nuzzles his nose between Yixing’s balls and kisses the tip of his cock and smiles as Yixing’s cock slowly start to grow against his mouth. He wiggles the cloth out from under Yixing and shoves it aside as Yixing’s fingers tangles in his hair and strokes through it, pushing Jongdae’s bangs away from his forehead. Their eyes meet across the expanse of Yixing’s chest and Jongdae kisses a path on the tan skin from right above Yixing’s cock to under his chin as one hand wets the sponge in the cold river water.

  
The air is humid, but the cold of the water draws shivers from Yixing’s body as Jongdae’s hand guides the sponge over his shoulders. Good shivers as for Yixing, whose body is always overheated, the coolness of the water is a relief on his skin.  
Jongdae dunks the sponge in the water again, not wringing it out before placing it square in the middle of Yixing’s chest and letting droplets run down his sides and pool in his navel. Yixing moans softly as Jongdae grips the sponge in his hand again and drags it slowly down to his stomach, cleaning his skin of yesterday’s filth and pressing kisses into Yixing’s body.

Wherever the sponge travels Jongdae’s mouth follows, little flicks of tongue and sucking lips along Yixing’s sides and over his collarbones and down both arms, in the centre of Yixing’s palms. He kisses until his lips tingle with cold and the sponge is dropped back into the water bowl. Yixing’s eyes stay fixed on the lazily dipping sponge until Jongdae’s hands, wet and icy cold, cup his cheeks and cold lips touch his own. They kiss slowly, tongues curling around each other and Yixing bites first at Jongdae’s bottom lip and then his upper lip, sucking them into his mouth and gnawing gently at the flesh until they are red and swollen and so warm. He slips his hands under Jongdae’s shirt and around his waist, glides them up Jongdae’s back so the loose fabric is lifted up and away from his mates burning skin until he can lift it over Jongdae’s head. As Jongdae’s arms drop from having them stretched over his head, Yixing sits up and they curl over his strong shoulders and Jongdae digs his fingers in the skin as Yixing sucks hotly on his collarbones, marking them red.

Jongdae kneels in between Yixing’s legs with his face buried in Yixing’s hair as the older licks and bites and sucks on as much of his neck and shoulders as he can reach, spending minutes on the mating mark on the left side of Jongdae’s neck until it is almost as vivid as when he first made it months ago. Moans filter through the dark strands of Yixing’s hair as his hands smooth over Jongdae’s shoulder blades and down to the small of his back and over the swell of his ass. His hands that have always been soft and so steady whether in cooking or mending or stitching wounds, holds Jongdae so securely and the touch of them is a comforting reminder that no matter how close he came to loosing him, Yixing is still with him and Jongdae can do nothing but smile as he pushes Yixing back to the ground. He lets his hands trail along Yixing’s skin down to his left leg, which he lifts from the ground as he reaches once again for the sponge. Sliding it along Yixing’s thigh, Jongdae rests his mouth on the raised knee and looks into Yixing’s eyes. There is nothing but love, unconditional and absolute, shining back at him and their smiles paint equal gentle lines on their faces. This is all either of them want, skin on burning skin and the quiet understanding of never again being alone.  
  
Jongdae cleans every inch of Yixing with the sponge, behind his knees and down his calves and between his toes, placing kisses on clean sun-tanned skin. He cleans his cock in his hands, gathers cold water in his cupped palms and lets it drizzle over his crotch to watch him shudder and squirm. As an ending stroke Jongdae spreads Yixing’s cheeks apart and swipes the sponge slowly between them. Yixing moans and arches his back away from the ground and Jongdae drops the sponge right then to lie down between his legs and take his mouth in a bruising kiss.

Suddenly their movements are rushed, Yixing pulls him in with hands gripping his ass and Jongdae ruts into him in complete abandon with their mouths fused together desperately. They fuck like that, gasping into each other’s mouth with Yixing’s feet pushing from the ground to get as close as possible to Jongdae’s hips thrusting, his cock sliding slickly in and out of Yixing’s ass, until the sudden desperate need slowly simmers inside them, loosing ferocity as Jongdae’s hips loose speed until he is sitting still inside Yixing and they are kissing softly with wet sloppy lips.

  
It’s like a rule with them, they don’t let anger or desperation or fear be their finale, the ending is always soft, sometimes sweet and more about love than pleasure. Jongdae has rid himself of his fear in Yixing’s body and all that is left is their need for each other.  
And so Yixing pushes the younger away, lays him out on his back and looks into his eyes. He pushes the hair away from Jongdae’s forehead and places a lingering kiss against it. His lips move slowly down Jongdae’s face, lower lip dragging against skin and mouth pressing kisses into Jongdae’s temple, cheek, eyelids, chin and down his throat. Jongdae swallows against his lips when Yixing sucks on his Adam’s apple.

  
With Jongdae’s hands guiding him Yixing lowers his hips to touch with Jongdae’s and their hard cocks slide together in delicious friction. After the first glide of Yixing’s cock against his, Jongdae pulls Yixing even closer with a hand on the back of his neck and their mouths meet in a sudden clash of lips that easily melts into a wet and intense kiss, as slow and passionate as the grinding of their hips.  
Yixing’s kisses continue down his neck and over his developed pectorals and flat stomach, his hands trail up and down Jongdae’s sides as he takes the youngers cock in his mouth and sucks it all the way into his mouth at once before pulling back to suckle softly at the head. His breath leaves him in a loud moan as Jongdae’s head drops back onto the soft ground, his hips buck slightly against Yixing’s face and Yixing lets him, hollows his cheeks and lets Jongdae fuck into his mouth. It’s too good and already having been pulled to the edge by Yixing’s wondrous ass, Jongdae feels his release building and when Yixing stills his moving hips with his hands and sucks hard around half of his cock Jongdae comes, sudden and a lot, filling Yixing’s mouth with his cum and shuddering hard as Yixing moans at the taste, the sound vibrating up his cock and down to his toes and to the tips of his fingers.  
  
When he comes to again Yixing is stroking the outside of his thighs and singing softly and it takes a moment for Jongdae to realise that he actually blacked out.  
“How long …” he croaks and Yixing hums, “a couple minutes.” Jongdae still feels a little disoriented and off-kilter, but Yixing leaves him no more time to recover as suddenly there are fingers slipping inside him and a mouth sucking harshly on his mating mark and Jongdae whines loudly at the double sensation. His body is so sensitive that only Yixing’s hands on his thighs had made him shudder and so the muscles of his ass flutter endlessly around Yixing’s fingers as his mate gently pumps them in and out and spreads them apart inside him.

  
If he is being honest, this is one of Jongdae’s favourite things. He loves Yixing’s fingers, the slender and long digits is his favourite thing to suck on, even above Yixing’s cock, and having them inside him, playing with his ass the way they are, is something he never wants to end. And so he lifts his legs in the air, holds them back with a hand under each of his knees and gives Yixing ample space and easy reach. It throws his mind back months ago when Yixing bit into his neck and licked up his blood and took his virginity so gently Jongdae fell instantly in love. Yixing had used what felt like at the time to be hours just fingering him loose and Jongdae so badly wants him to do that again. Never mind that the muscles of his ass are already pretty loose. So he whines breathily and clenches around Yixing’s fingers, tries to communicate without the words that are stuck in his throat and Yixing rubs his walls with his finger pads and strokes his stomach and kisses his lips and so Jongdae relaxes and enjoys.

  
Yixing’s fingers are still steadily pumping in and out until he stills his fingers at the rim of Jongdae’s ass and spreads them apart, making a V with his fingers he turns his wrist around before he pushes the two fingers back inside and curls them upwards, right on Jongdae’s prostate. The touch has Jongdae arching from the blanket and sucking air into his lungs that is let out in a long moan when Yixing retracts his fingers and Jongdae’s body falls back to the ground.  
Yixing pumps his fingers a few more times before touching the prostate again and this time the reaction is more subdued, only a breathy moan falling from Jongdae’s lips as he writhes more and more for every push against that sensitive spot inside him. He groans appreciatively when Yixing adds a third finger and he finally notices the stretch and the fullness, and his hands grasp the blanket beneath him when Yixing speeds up the pumping of his fingers and angles them so that they will press firmly against Jongdae’s prostate on every inward push. His head trash back and forth and his legs curls against Yixing’s shoulders, toes pressing into Yixing’s back when his hips lifts from the ground and Yixing is carrying most of his weight now but he doesn’t complain, only grunts as his hand pumps unceasingly into Jongdae’s ass.

  
Yixing works with the clear intent of making Jongdae come again as his fingers stop pumping and instead settle against Jongdae’s prostate and rubs back and forth and Jongdae keens at the intense sensation and his thighs clench around Yixing’s head and his ass flutters around Yixing’s fingers and it feels too much, feels like he shouldn’t be able to handle this sensory overload, but he does as he always does and he is coming, he is nearly there, just one more … but Yixing pulls his fingers out and leaves Jongdae suspended in that space of almost but not quite and his body won’t relax, his back frozen in an arch and he is balanced between his own shoulders pressing into the ground and Yixing’s shoulders still holding strong under his weight.

  
Yixing takes hold of the underside of his knees and gently lowers his legs, careful not to upset his back as it folds back against the ground and then he crawls over Jongdae without touching him anymore and nips softly at his lower lip. Jongdae’s face is scrunched up and even as it relaxes he seems completely gone, unresponsive to Yixing’s kisses and he is still not breathing. Slowly he comes to and bites back on Yixing’s lips because that was the cruellest thing anyone has ever done to him and it won’t go unpunished. Incredulous and annoyed Jongdae still entertains Yixing by kissing back and for a long time that is all they do, Yixing poised on all fours above Jongdae and nothing but their mouths and Jongdae’s hands in Yixing’s hair connecting them, until Yixing is there, as suddenly as his fingers had been earlier, his cock pushes inside Jongdae and it feels good enough for Jongdae to allow it.

  
They moan together when Yixing rocks his hips back and forth, shallow thrusts where he is buried completely inside and their tongues run over cheeks and lips and teeth and their breath mingles with Yixing’s soft sounds from the tightness surrounding him. He makes the same sounds whether he is balls deep in Jongdae or seated on Jongdae’s cock and Jongdae loves that about his mate, the pleasure is the same for Yixing no matter what they do, and it makes Jongdae feel slightly guilty when he is so in love with fucking Yixing into every surface they can make it work on, while having Yixing inside him like this only sometimes makes him come. Maybe he isn’t as much like a beta as Joonmyeon thinks.

  
Right now though, he doesn’t feel any guilt, and he won’t when Yixing will inevitably be unable to drive him to orgasm, but still he enjoys it and he voices his pleasure with moans and dirty words gasped into the humid air.  
“Fuck yes Xing! You feel so good” his words make Yixing groan and his hips thrust harder against him, pulling almost all the way back and thrusting harshly into him, their bodies smacking together with a wet slap.  
The stuttering of Yixing’s hips and the warmth of his come seeping into Jongdae’s ass is the only tell of his orgasm, no other sound than his constant little gasps to mark the end and as Yixing tries to snuggle down into Jongdae’s chest for a moment of reprieve, Jongdae quickly pushes him off and moves his spent body around to his liking.  
  
Yixing whines in his post-orgasm tiredness as he is forced onto his stomach and drawn up to support himself on his knees. He mumbles tiredly when Jongdae slaps his ass and so Jongdae does it again, harder than before and repeats it until Yixing is moaning into the blanket and there is a nicely red handprint on his right ass cheek and then he leans down and bites into the flesh and licks a path to Yixing’s hole. With one long stroke of his tongue over Yixing’s hole he has the older moaning loudly once before his soft gasping begins again. Jongdae flicks his tongue out against the puckered rim and bites at Yixing’s left ass cheek and then places a light kiss against his opening.

  
It seems Jongdae’s mind is determined to flood him with memories as the action of eating Yixing out brings him back once more to their first time, after Yixing had claimed him and was lying on his stomach in the furs and his ass looked so inviting to Jongdae he couldn’t help but taste it. Jongdae had been raised to be an alpha’s mate, every beta was, and so he was surprised at the immense need he felt to have Yixing’s ass and so he had thought maybe licking him, like how Baekhyun had teased him about when they first came into their wolves and started feeling the need for a mate and physical contact, would help alleviate his nervousness. Yixing had loved it, moaning all the way through and Jongdae found he loved doing it, if only to hear those sounds again.  
And so when he places a kiss against Yixing’s puckered opening he sucks strongly and it has Yixing moaning again and he doesn’t stop as Jongdae thrusts his tongue past the muscles and rolls it expertly against his walls.

The process of rimming is a torture to Yixing because it feels good but it is never enough to give him that spark of electricity up his spine and that is exactly why Jongdae chooses to prolong it, thrust his tongue in and out and suck on the outer ring of muscles and flick his tongue over it again and again until Yixing is sobbing and not even then does he let up.  
He only stops when Yixing is begging him in a breathy voice to please, please stop, and then he leans back on his heels and takes in the sight of Yixing’s body. His shoulders are pressed into the ground and his back is a perfect arch up to his raised hips and his ass is wriggling desperately in front of Jongdae. His face is half hidden by sweaty hair, but his mouth is visible and it is gaping and there is a tremor in his jaw and Jongdae can just about see the wetness of tears on his cheek and slipping off his chin. In a moment of sadistic pleasure, it makes him smile.  
  
And then he is slicking his cock with oil and pushing forward to rest his cock against Yixing’s ass. Only the touch of Jongdae’s cock between his ass cheeks has Yixing sobbing in relief and he moans louder than ever when Jongdae guides it to rest against his opening and slowly starts to push inside. He keeps it slow, pushing in only a fragment before pulling back and then repeats, pushing further in for every time until he is as far inside as he can. Yixing has yet to stop moaning but he gradually quietens as Jongdae stills inside him and only occasionally rolls his hips in shallow thrusts. He is past desperate and finally getting what he needs so his shameless moaning reverts to the gentle gasping he usually emits and that is when Jongdae starts moving for real. Pulling out all the way, he slides his cock once up and down the crease of Yixing’s ass before pushing back in and he does that a few times more before he thrusts inside and stays inside and his cock glides smoothly inside Yixing’s ass in slow, strong thrusts.

  
His hands are gripping Yixing’s hips, bruising them with his fingertips, and he fucks him purely for his own pleasure. He knows Yixing’s cock is starting to fill up again (Jongdae can’t imagine having sex without a wolf’s stamina, how boring must it be), but he does not intend to touch it even once. His mate will have to see to that himself even though he knows Yixing is too far gone to manage it, but that is his punishment.  
Jongdae can feel his stomach clenching as his breath quickens and so his hips speed up as well and soon he is fucking into Yixing with no regard for their bruising hips or how it might cause discomfort to his mate, intent on his own release only and it crashes over him in a succession of waves as his cock pumps shot after shot of come into Yixing’s ass. When Jongdae is coming down from his high Yixing is pushing back on his still hard cock and clenching desperately around it and then he too is coming, soiling the blanket beneath them and with his hands still clenched beside his head, the only thing pushing him to orgasm having been Jongdae’s cock inside him.

  
Slowly Jongdae’s cock softens inside Yixing and they fall onto their sides to be spooned together and their chests rise and fall in synchronised, rhythmic breaths. Jongdae thinks they are done, even though he could still go another round, so he wraps his arms around Yixing’s waist and strokes his chest. His fingers drag through Yixing’s come and his right hand lifts up to Yixing’s mouth and after a short moment, not of hesitation but simple exhaustion, Yixing’s tongue is pulling Jongdae’s fingers into his mouth.

He swallows his own come from his mate’s fingers until there is only a thin smear left on his stomach before rolling over and reaching for the sponge behind Jongdae. Slowly he cleans both of them of their sweat and release and once that is done to satisfaction he lies down again and pulls Jongdae into his arms. Jongdae tangles their legs together and rests his head on Yixing’s chest. His right hand smooth over Yixing’s skin up to his neck where his fingers tangle in Yixing’s hair and Yixing hums against the top of his head, pressing a kiss to his forehead. Jongdae likes being held like this, Yixing’s arms wound around him and holding him close, keeping him safe. However much he likes being in control and buried deep in his mate, he prefers it when Yixing holds him like this, or when Yixing’s body is pressed up to his back.

He might be demanding and sometimes even dominant with Yixing, but Jongdae has never felt secure in his own skin. Having Yixing has helped, but the only time Jongdae really feels completely at ease is wrapped up in his mate’s embrace, Yixing’s breath fanning over his ear or his neck or through his hair.  
Growing up to be their alphas mate while constantly being rejected by Joonmyeon did nothing to prepare him for the rightness of being with Yixing, but now he knows for sure that he would give up everything to keep Yixing by his side.  
  
*  
  
The following morning is quiet, shrouded in mist and the air is heavy around them as they walk back to the camp. Their hands are linked and they are walking close enough for their shoulders to brush and sometimes Jongdae will stop them to steal a kiss from Yixing who is back to being apprehensive and looking scared. Neither of them have any idea what they will be walking back into. If Luhan will greet them with Minseok at his side and a subdued smile on his face, or if there will only be Yifan with a solemn face and no words to give, or if Joonmyeon will be there, poised to drag them both through the dirt and exile them at best. They have no way of knowing, and that is really what last night was all about. They had to say goodbye.

  
When they reach the outskirts of camp they slow down almost to a stop, hesitating on that last step out of the trees. They can see their pack mates in the middle of the clearing, heaped together around the fire, but they are all as quiet as the forest around them. Suddenly Yifan rises from the outer edge of the circle of wolves and heads right towards them. His nose has always been finely tuned, especially to Yixing’s scent and neither of them are surprised that he already noticed them. His long legs lead Yifan quickly to stand in front of them and he pulls Yixing into his arms the moment he is close enough and Yixing clings to him, already fearing the worst, Jongdae knows. However, not a minute later they all smell Luhan coming up behind them, not making a sound as he steps out from behind a tree.  
He is dirty and bloodied, long gashes stretching from his shoulder down to his hip and another goes right across his stomach and around to his back. His legs are bruised all over, but he is walking with only a slight limp and no particular difficulty and that at least, is a good sign.

  
Jongdae feels a small shiver of despair and sadness at the sight of him, and suddenly he notices that miniscule emptiness in his mind. The part of him that was attuned to Joonmyeon, his alpha leader, is now nothing but a gaping black hole. Joonmyeon is gone. Tears well in his eyes and spill down his cheeks as he stands there frozen. Yixing is running his hands over Luhan’s body looking for internal injuries and Jongdae is happy that Luhan is alive, but he is also devastated that Joonmyeon is not. His alpha might not have been interested in him as anything else but a possession that was his and no one else’s, but when mating and their wolves weren’t involved Joonmyeon was a good friend, a very good friend to Jongdae. It is all a mess, it always was, and Jongdae both hates and loves Joonmyeon, but from now on he will always miss him as one of his closest friends.  
  
“I’m sorry Jongdae”, Luhan runs a bloodied hand through his hair and cups his face, his thumb smears a red streak in the tears on Jongdae’s face as he pulls him closer to rest their foreheads together. Jongdae feels the warmth of his alpha flow into him and Luhan’s presence nudge gently at that spot in his mind. Closing his eyes Jongdae lets him in and Luhan’s presence calms his howling wolf and fills the void left by Joonmyeon’s death, he has a new alpha now and finally Jongdae feels safe again.

  
Minseok has been standing patiently a few steps away, but once Luhan pulls away from Jongdae with one last gentle stroke of his thumb on Jongdae’s cheek, he is there with his soft hands pulling Luhan with him. Their alpha will be healed by morning, but his mate is the only one who can do that for him, the only one who can take away the guilt Luhan feels from what he has done.  
It’s quiet again after they leave, only a scattering of small sounds emitting from the pack of wolves around the fire when they notice Luhan is back, a mix of despair and relief and a fusion of both. Everyone loves Luhan, but that doesn’t mean that their pack might not be smaller by tomorrow morning than it is now. Joonmyeon’s brother’s pack is nearby, Jongdae knows because Joonmyeon talked about going to see him, so anyone who decides to leave won’t have long to go at least and Siwon will certainly welcome them. Jongdae has a feeling many will stay though, even if they might not bond with Luhan like he has. He thinks at least Baekhyun will stay, and the kids, and Chanyeol and Kyungsoo and Seulgi and the girls and … A pair of hands land gently on his shoulders and Yixing’s scent fills his nostrils when he breaths in deeply.

  
“Calm down” he whispers, “you are giving me a headache.” And Jongdae meets his eyes, just as surprised as Yixing sounded. Because mates can’t read each others mind, but there is a special connection that links them together, more spiritually than mentally, and it allows mates to share feelings in a way. Except the chance of it developing enough to be properly noticed is slim, but here they are, two betas who by nature should not feel the kind of need for each other as they do, entwined in the most intimate manner. And when Jongdae reaches out with his mind he feels Yixing’s heart beat in synch with his own and feels his love wash over him in a way he thought unimaginable. And Yixing smiles so brightly as the same love flows through him, unchecked like a river, running in circles from one to the other, driven by their passion and sustained by their unquestioning devotion.


End file.
